What is sexy?

The announcement earlier today about Angelina Jolie’s pre-emptive double mastectomy for fear of future breast cancer made me pause for a moment to consider what makes a woman sexy to me. What follows is purely subjective and I hope it is taken in the spirit in which it is meant.

What makes a woman sexy?

Is it her amazing boobs? (Angelina Jolie)

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Is it her sinewy legs? (Amy Purdy, activist and meningitis sufferer)

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Her flowing hair? (Persis Khambatta from Star Trek: The Motion Picture)

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Her fashion runway looks? (Emma Thompson)

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Her youth? (Dame Helen Mirren)

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Her demur nature and delicacy? (Team Canada’s Cassie Campbell)

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Her fame? (Leela with my grandmother)

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No, what makes a woman sexy is who that woman is, not what she is or how she looks. It is what comes from within when you take a moment to get to know her.

That is the sexy that stands the test of time. That is the sexy that makes me want to be in her presence.

(All photos used without permission, except the last one. Copyrights belong to owners.)

Another Liebster Award?

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I can’t believe how lucky I feel and how honoured I am to have been nominated for a second Liebster Award in just two months of running my blog. My nominator was new friend Julian Froment—book lover and reading fanatic—who blogs at http://julianfroment.wordpress.com/.

According to Julian, and as I recall from earlier, the rules for the Liebster Blog Award are:

  • List 11 random facts about yourself.
  • Answer a series of questions that were asked of you.
  • Nominate another 11 bloggers for the Liebster Award and link to their blogs.
  • Notify those bloggers of their nominations.
  • Ask those bloggers 11 questions they must answer in accepting their award.

Eleven (different) random facts:

  1. I missed actually being at the Pentagon (specifically, the metro station) on 9/11 by about an hour.
  2. I have an almost paralytic fear of heights and am getting sweaty as I type this because I am thinking of heights of which I have been afraid
  3. I adore sleep and positively purr in those moments just before sleep arrives and just as I awake
  4. I am a nature/science documentary junkie, but not the ones with overt agendas that border on zealotry (even if I agree with the agenda)
  5. To celebrate my 50th birthday this year, I am trying to plan an evening comedy cabaret in support of some charity, just so I can hang out with funny people
  6. I would eat cold cereal for all 3 main meals if I could
  7. I typically create my written works long-hand in a notebook and then transfer to the computer
  8. I struggle with weight and have been an emotional eater my entire life
  9. I am a dog person, but real dogs, not those rats with a glandular condition (no offense to rats)
  10. I have a tattoo that reads Julius Caesar V. v. 73
  11. When it comes to housework, I am tidy but not clean…I’ll organize, but it’s gotta be pretty dirty for me to mop it

Julian’s questions of me:

  1. What is your favourite book? I would pick something by Shakespeare, but as you specified book, I would have to go with Dune, which for all its brevity, provides an amazingly intricate story that also serves as something of an ecological allegory.
  2. Do you play an instrument? If so, which one? No, but have often wished I did, as I am envious of the joy others experience while playing.
  3. What is your ideal holiday? Sunshine, warmth, water, a breeze, a notebook and my camera.
  4. Which author would you most like to meet (they do not need to be currently alive)? As I behaved earlier, I will cheat here and push for Shakespeare, although I must admit to some trepidation that the man could not possibly match the art.
  5. What is your favourite genre to write in? I am a natural comedy writer—sketch, sitcom, movie—but don’t like to be hemmed in by specific genre…not wanting to sound pretentious but certain I will, my genre is story.
  6. What is your least favourite book? There have been many books I have found lacking, but if forced to focus my animosity on just one, it would have to be Ken Dryden’s The Moved and the Shaken, which if nothing else answered my question why don’t people write novels about normal people leading normal lives (answer: they are boring).
  7. Do you have siblings, if so which? Yes, I have two brothers, whom I am happy to say I have finally learned to appreciate as great men—the lack was on my part, not theirs.
  8. PC or Mac? PC
  9. Do you eat meat? Aggressively so!
  10. What is your favourite sport? Hockey (and specifically, my beloved Toronto Marlies)
  11. Do you have a day job? No…it got in the way of my storytelling efforts.

Eleven nominees for the Liebster Award:

I believe the idea behind the Liebster is to promote relatively new bloggers who have fewer than some threshold of followers (I’ve seen anywhere from 200 to 500).

Last time, I begged off on this part, because I really didn’t know anyone who fit that category, but I feel it would be a cop out to do the same this time, so I am simply going to nominate people who jazz me in some manner.

  1. Ben’s Bitter Blog – for his sardonic wit and the sheer pleasure he takes in bitterness
  2. A Day in the Life of Shareen A – she makes me smile
  3. BadsPhotoBlog – because I thought he was nuts for considering these bad photos (misread the name)
  4. Salty Palette – for the sheer delicacy of these amazing photographs
  5. Ryan Hermann – for making me want to try harder with my camera
  6. Pressed Words – their sheer elan and joy of food
  7. Bite Size Canada – for the tireless efforts to celebrate Canada’s history and culture
  8. Life According to Madelin – because her interests are completely unrelated to mine but her joy is not
  9. Write, Read, Repeat – for her sheer determination to do just that

Questions for the nominees:

  1. What is your primary art, whether desired or actively pursued?
  2. Artichokes, brussel sprouts, beets, bok choy, durian. Which, if any, of these do you enjoy eating?
  3. What teacher meant the most to you in your life (school or otherwise)?
  4. Do you actively or would you consider mentoring someone?
  5. Are you funny and can you give an example (either way)?
  6. If you could be any other species, which would you choose?
  7. Pick a number between 1 and 3.
  8. Do you live urban, suburban or rural?
  9. What is the most exotic place you have ever visited (define exotic as you wish)?
  10. What actor or performer turns you on? Turns your stomach?
  11. When was the last time you cried (for whatever reason, positive or negative)?

I look forward to learning more about each of you.

When life interferes

It has been an incredibly slow week on the blog as far as new posts are concerned. But whereas most people slow down periodically to take care of things that distract us from our writing like work, family obligations, vacations, etc, my absence from the blog has had more to do with writing than with not writing.

The past week has been an endless series of projects, all of which require some degree of writing.

Last Thursday, I started the latest of my screenwriting classes and needed to do some final edits before bringing my pages to class to be read aloud. As well, I needed to read the works of other students to get a handle on their work and to offer insights.

Friday brought meetings with potential clients to discuss their web and marketing strategies (and a lovely Indian buffet to boot). And the afternoon was spent doing research for an upcoming article on the anniversary of the elucidation of the structure of DNA (Happy 60th Birthday, DNA!), followed by an evening at baseball (yaaaaaawn) and then drinks with my screenwriting circle. I also picked up a new medical writing freelance gig.

Saturday and Sunday were chock-a-block full of my attempts to live-Tweet two hockey games between my Toronto Marlies and the St. John’s IceCap in the American Hockey League. You want to miss half a sporting event? Try live-Tweeting a hockey game. By the time you look up from your phone, you have another incident to Tweet.

The weekend and Monday were also spent on that freelance writing gig, so I buried my head into the wonders of neuropharmacology and tried to make sense of a chimera of a slide deck, trying to tease a coherent story out of the presentation. Yes, even medical information comes in the form of a story…or at least the better ones do.

And then to rattle my brain a little, I headed back to Art & Fear; a little book on the challenges that present themselves when trying to create art (more on the book in a later post). Step One: Go, create Art. The guilt from the book was enough to make me sit in front of my laptop and churn out 3 more pages for my latest screenplay…a lovely little family drama-comedy set in Eastern Canada.

And so, my poor blog languished in neglect. No doubt, feeling unloved and forgotten.

Not so, my blog, not so.

But you will need to learn to share my attentions with others. It’s all for the best, I promise.

Lucked into a team photo with the Toronto Marlies (me=last person, second row, right)

Lucked into a team photo with the Toronto Marlies (me=last person, second row, right)

Thanks for listening

Just found out that I have 1,003 likes on my blog in just over a month, so I’d like (ha!) to thank everyone for their support and interest.

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And, because no good deed goes unpunished, I’d also welcome you to check out some of the other venues where you will find me spouting nonsense (gotta pay the bills, you know).

Toronto Marlies page at Maple Leafs Central – news from the American Hockey League team

Drug Discovery News – commentaries and special features

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A medical writer for too long

I’m sitting at the Ricoh Coliseum waiting for a Toronto Marlies hockey game to start. As people move to their seats, they’ll stand at the railing to watch the warm up. As people join them and start to converse, they slow others trying to get to their seats.
Where others might see an annoying crowd, my mind strays to atherosclerosis, arterial plaque build up. If the lights suddenly go down at the Ricoh, the arena’s had a stroke.
I have seriously been in medical writing too long!

(Teddy Bear Toss game at the Ricoh back in November. Hooray charitable people)

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Shoot where the goalie isn’t

I’ve spent a lot of time in ice rinks watching beer-league and kids hockey and one thing that has amazed me is how often players will shoot the puck into the goalie’s chest. We all know that the object of the game is to get the puck past the goalie, but for whatever reason, our shot is drawn to the goalie rather than to the net. It is as though the goalie secretly inserted a small metal bar in the puck before the game and is now wearing a strong magnet under his or her pads.

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(American Hockey League; Toronto Marlies vs. Hamilton Bulldogs)

I’ve also decided that on a typical office trash can, the rim of the can generates a gravitational well. I say this because, no matter how often I throw a wad of paper into the can, from whatever angle or distance, I am more likely to hit the rim of the can than I am to sink the shot or miss completely. Something must bend space because if you look at the volume of the universe taken up by the rim and compare that to the rest of the frickin’ universe, it doesn’t make sense that I would hit the rim so often.

Of course, another explanation for both of these phenomena is that humans have an instinctive fetish for what we can see; that we are unconsciously drawn to the tangible to the detriment of the intangible.

The reason I wax on about this is because I believe what is true for trash cans and hockey games is also true for creativity.

After rehearsals for a sketch comedy show for which I write, I was drinking with some of the actors and one of them asked me how I came up the ideas for my sketches. How did I take a relatively mundane scenario and find just the right moment and way to skew it to elicit humour?

For me, I said, it’s about perspective and being able to ignore the hard edges of reality to see relationships no one else has bothered to see.

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(Photo taken in Barbados)

Too many of us get hung up on what we see, what sits before us in all its light-reflecting, retina-stimulating glory. We see reality and get stuck on that being simply what is. Reality just is. There’s nothing else other than it.

Sitting across from her, I described the wide-eyed reality I saw.

In the foreground was sugar packets, salt and pepper shakers, the table, my beer glass, her beer glass. Slightly behind that was her, the barely restrained frenzy of her hair, her facial expression, the curve of her neck, shoulders and arms, her clothes. Behind her, a table of four animated people sharing a night out (won’t go into details) and behind them, a window onto a busy Toronto street; sidewalks, pedestrians, traffic, storefronts.

I then squinted my eyes and all those hard edges faded away to be replaced with a visual melange. I could not tell where my friend ended and the woman behind her started. Vague shapes of pedestrians blebbed out of her head, like animated thoughts or alter-egos escaping into the night.

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(Photo of a fountain on Toronto’s Canadian National Exhibition grounds)

My perspective had changed, so my reality had changed. I no longer saw a goalie blocking my shot or a trash can rim siphoning wads of paper from the vaster universe.

However it is accomplished, I think this is what separates open creatives from the rest of humanity, and by creatives, I mean not just artists (writers, painters, photographers, etc) but also entrepreneurs and technology innovators. They understand the lowercase nature of realities rather than Reality.

The altered perspectives are there for anyone to see—and everyone’s perspectives are going to be different—but it is the creatives who choose to look for them. We can see where the goalie isn’t and choose to shoot there.

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(The Toronto Marlies beat the Hamilton Bulldogs at Toronto’s Air Canada Centre)