…and all my other female actor friends and colleagues, a simple request to storytellers and writers:
When creating a female character for your story (or any character, for that matter), please describe her in terms that reflect who she is and not in terms of how she relates to another.
Phrases like ex-girlfriend or soccer mom provide only a limited degree of context and tell us nothing at all about your vision for that character.
Is she a psychotic Glen Close type of character or is she a nurturing Barbara Billingsley type of character?
To what does she aspire?
If presented with a spider, she would [fill in the blank].
Around a board room table, her position would be [location], she would be dressed [adjective], her posture would be [adjective] and her eyes would express [noun].
If the character is important enough to move your story along, the character is important enough to be a human being (or whatever species you are dealing with).
If not, then you probably don’t need the character in your story.